What she said

The issue about whether or not men can call themselves feminists isn't one I have a lot of energy for. I think both sides make some good points, but ultimately I just don't care (hey there's another issue, maybe I should start collecting them).

What I do care about is men who pretend to care about women's issues, women's lives, and then proceed to treat women like shit. Girl Bomb does an outstanding job of detailing this phenomena in its different forms. The one that I've come across the most is example two:

Edgy sexy artsy bisexual left-wing guy is always suggestive and provocative, always posting impassioned essays on Art and Politics, and especially Feminism. He talks about the pro-choice rallies and political events he's attended, but he doesn't mention that he went for the chicks. He likes to tell people what feminism does and doesn't mean -- to him, feminism is mostly about "women's freedom to express themselves sexually without being shamed or oppressed by other feminists." Id est: porn, threesomes, and you taking the pill. He'll argue for sex-positive feminism all day long, putting down other feminists for being "patronizing, infantilizing, and patriarchal." PS: He's only pretending to be bisexual.

I have known that guy, more than once; I've known people, I've known groups, damaged by that guy. She's right about everything else as well. That calling yourself a feminist of feigning interest in women's issues is no guarantee . It makes being a woman in left-wing circles so hard, because you can't trust men, not based on what they say. You have to wait until you know them, you have to be careful, and they're supposed to be your comrades.

Do read the whole thing, and check out her signs to look for, they're very useful:

3. Is smarter than you, and more "rational" (i.e., not ruled by terrifying and psychotic mood swings), but doesn't hold that against you. Understands that women are more "emotional" than men, and therefore susceptible to "simple misinterpretation." Smirks, smarms, provokes, and blathers until you go crazy, then calls you crazy.